Friday, December 4, 2015

Negative Husband – Negative Marriage – When Is It Time to Move On?

Dec. 4, 2015

Dear Cathy:

I have been married for 10 years.  My husband is always negative.  He has no friends of his own and he constantly sits around the house and complain, complain, complain.  We don't have any kids and I don't work, but I am still thinking about leaving him, but my finances tell me I can’t go anywhere.  What do you suggest?  Need To Leave Marriage, Florida

Dear Need To Leave Marriage:

Many people are just negative - the naysayers, the doom and gloom people - and no matter what you do, they will not change.  Many men need to understand the phrase "Happy Wife, Happy Life."  In other words, if men don't keep their wives happy, then they are in for a rude awakening.

Many women have said the same thing about their marriage and many of them stay and some leave.  Many women stay because they are afraid to live alone or they don’t see anything better on the horizon but why waste the most valuable years of your life on someone who could give two cents? 

It all depends on if you want to explore other options. Reach out to family members to see if you can move in while you become financially secure with your own job or business.  That option has got to be better than what you are putting up with at this time.

Do whatever you have to to make it work but if you are at the end of your rope, then it’s definitely time to move on. Make a list of the pros and cons of your marriage, tally them up and weigh the cons against how you feel living the life you are living now.

A licensed counselor may be able to steer you in the right direction, which could include working with a marriage counselor to hang onto the marriage or consulting a lawyer and getting a divorce.

There is probably a man out there that will love you and would love to make you happy but you will never know this if you continue to stay in a loveless, negative marriage.

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