Daughter Flunking Out of College Because of Party School

Jan. 27, 2015

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Dear Cathy:

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My daughter and I have always been close.  She is the first person on my side of the family that have ever attended college.  I never went to college so I had a hard time helping her get into a college away from home.  Now I found out that she is attending a party school and her grades are dropping as a Freshman.  What can I do now to help my daughter get back on track so she can finish school?  Party School Regret, California

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Dear Party School Regret:

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First of all don’t regret helping your daughter get into college.  You have already done what most parents will never be able to do.  On many occasions, students will have to prepare for college on their own because many parents don’t understand what it takes.  The fact that you assisted her shows you are a good parent.

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What you need to understand is that most college students will fail out of college the first year which is the hardest year.  So this is the time for parents to be hands-on with their children and remind them why they went to college in the first place.  

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Many will fail because they selected the wrong school especially a party school.  There are a ton of students out there who are spending every waking moment of their Sophomore, Junior and Senior years trying to compensate for the massive mistakes made during their Freshman year. 

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So try to reel your daughter back in by informing her that if she gets off to a bad start, she is asking for serious trouble all through college.  Tell her to commit to going to the library in a secluded spot for at least 4 or 5 hours a day and do nothing but studying.  Then let her know that she will have plenty of time for partying the rest of the day or on weekends but also remind her that she needs to use common sense for that too.  

You can also transfer her to another school or let her take some time off from college but remember when many students take too much time off, they never go back especially after they start buying the finer things in life.  To learn more about college life and how to avoid other mistakes read Chapter 12 of the book "Recession Survival Guide: How To Get Back Into the Driver's Seat" entitled "How To Get Into College."