Kids Resisting New Move

Jan. 8, 2016

Dear Cathy:

I am a single mother and I need to relocate for my job 3 states away from my parents. My company provided us with temporary housing for a couple of months so basically we just have to move in. However, my kids who are 10 and 11, are very unhappy about the move. I am thinking about leaving them behind with my mother and father until school finishes in about 3 months, but my mother hasn’t been feeling well. What do you think? Loss for Words, Kansas

Dear Loss for Words:

Being a single mother will take a lot out of you but remember you are the boss. Kids ages 10 and 11 don’t have any say so about what you decide to do as an adult. 

Three months is a very long time to be without your children, especially to leave them in the hands of someone who is not well.

Whether your kids want to move or not, it comes down to one thing, you – you make the decision. Would it be a hardship for you to leave them behind? Would it be a hardship on your mother? 

Kids at that age are resilient and usually can adjust to change and face it, kids at that age, need to be with their mother. However, I would not make this statement if they were in high school. 

Kids in high school have a really hard time leaving their friends behind but now is a good time for you to move so your children can adjust to their new surroundings.

Make the move fun by stopping along the way sightseeing, taking pictures and videos -- so tell your kids that they will be moving but let them know what they will be able to see along the way. Again make the trip fun.