Monday, November 30, 2015

Mate Won’t Give Up Closet Space

Nov. 30, 2015

Dear Cathy:

I recently moved in a home with a man that I truly love and have dated for 10 years. We are both retired so we finally decided to move in together, however, he refused to move most of his items out of his closet to give me room. 

He has lived alone for a while and like doing things his way.  He said since I had so many things I needed to put my things in the extra bedroom so that I would have the closet space that I needed.  Did I make a mistake by moving in with him?  Move-In Mistake, Florida

Dear Move-In Mistake:

No not really, however, not compromising in the bedroom might lead to problems down the road so most men need to understand that. 

A woman want to feel like she belongs in a home, especially when you invite her to move in with you and if she does not have the run of the house, especially the bedroom, it might cause problems. 

On the other hand, placing all your items in the other closet and bedroom will give you the ‘she-cave’ that you probably need when you just want to relax. 

Many men have space issues so it’s always a good idea to have your own area in your home where you can go and relax when you want to be alone.

Remember that as men (women too) ages, they will become too set in their ways so it will be hard for him to give up his space for you or make other changes in other areas of his life.

I would not make a big deal out of the living arrangements.  See how he treats you – that’s the most important thing.  If he goes out of his way in other areas to make you feel welcome, then again I would not make a big deal out of it. 

You both are under the same roof, which should give both of you more cozier times with each other.

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